Recuperating Guilt and Accomplishments
Yesterday I came into work only to pack up and go back home. The head cold sinus throat thing was hovering and my boss just said, "Go home, please!"
See, it's that guilt thing. Even when I know I would feel better to stay at home and rest, I think, "Well, I am able to walk, hell, I am still breathing, so I am going to work." When co-workers come to work feeling crappy, I think, "Gees, just stay home. Why are you bringing your germs and your mediocre productivity to work when you should be at home resting? Are you trying to be a hero?" It's like that.
So yesterday I went home, to rest-out the last of this head cold thing. When I got home, I put on the kettle to make a cup of tea. J was home. On off-duty day. He starts to load the washing machine with a portion of the laundry. Feeling guilty, I think, I can't just sit here when he is doing chores. So I start putting up the dishes out of the dishwasher. J makes the bed in our bedroom, and I sweep the kitchen floor. J starts to gather up the trash because tomorrow is trash day, and I wander into the hobby room and start sorting through the mess on the hobby table.
By the end of the day I had completely cleaned off the hobby table, the floors were all swept, we had purchased a new dresser for the boys from the furniture shop just up the road from our neighborhood, I managed to nap about an hour, and I made chicken and dumplings for dinner. (Actually I had help with dinner. Z peeled the carrots and helped make the dumplings! He loves to help in the kitchen and he is getting to be more of a help now that he's older.)
At the end of the day I felt rested and much better and isn't that what matters?
This morning when I got to work I was chatting with the ladies in my area. We all agreed that it's impossible to just rest like we should when we get sick. Unless we are so physically down with fever or something, we'll find ways to make our time at home productive. And perhaps that is part of the healing.
Tack till Susanne och Josse for being like-minded!
See, it's that guilt thing. Even when I know I would feel better to stay at home and rest, I think, "Well, I am able to walk, hell, I am still breathing, so I am going to work." When co-workers come to work feeling crappy, I think, "Gees, just stay home. Why are you bringing your germs and your mediocre productivity to work when you should be at home resting? Are you trying to be a hero?" It's like that.
So yesterday I went home, to rest-out the last of this head cold thing. When I got home, I put on the kettle to make a cup of tea. J was home. On off-duty day. He starts to load the washing machine with a portion of the laundry. Feeling guilty, I think, I can't just sit here when he is doing chores. So I start putting up the dishes out of the dishwasher. J makes the bed in our bedroom, and I sweep the kitchen floor. J starts to gather up the trash because tomorrow is trash day, and I wander into the hobby room and start sorting through the mess on the hobby table.
By the end of the day I had completely cleaned off the hobby table, the floors were all swept, we had purchased a new dresser for the boys from the furniture shop just up the road from our neighborhood, I managed to nap about an hour, and I made chicken and dumplings for dinner. (Actually I had help with dinner. Z peeled the carrots and helped make the dumplings! He loves to help in the kitchen and he is getting to be more of a help now that he's older.)
At the end of the day I felt rested and much better and isn't that what matters?
This morning when I got to work I was chatting with the ladies in my area. We all agreed that it's impossible to just rest like we should when we get sick. Unless we are so physically down with fever or something, we'll find ways to make our time at home productive. And perhaps that is part of the healing.
Tack till Susanne och Josse for being like-minded!
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